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The magic of chiliSome folks just go to burger joints, some have progressed to hamburger helper, but the real folk cook their own. I know we all have to start somewhere. Tuna noodle casserole, lasagna, that thing with the green beans and the little onion rings, they are all just recipes. But chili now, that's a whole other thing. Chili isn't a recipe, it is a philosophy. Dare we say a mirror on life. Some folks are white bread, vanilla, mayo, velveeta... they like the mild, bland barely chili stuff that might as well be spaghetti sauce with beans. Other folks are hang glider, Ferrari, Tabasco sauce, Aruba, steak rare... they like the chili that makes your face sweat, the hurt-your-mouth stuff. But hey, it's all still chili. Your chili reflects you. I'm hard core, I like the Marquis de Sade chili, but then my idea of a good date involves handcuffs and swim fins. You may prefer the Pat Boone, Donnie and Marie chili.Just like Beauty, we each have our own idea what chili should be. Each idea is different, like snowflakes. But just like snowflakes, there are certain basic qualities that all chili must possess. In the broader sense, there are chilis based on chicken, vegetarian chili, fruit chili (I swear to God), and other similar offenses, but real chili has to be based on tomatoes and beef. Beyond that, there's a lot of leeway. Thick, thin and soupy, beans, no beans. The bigger the mess you make, the better stuff tastes.This isn't a recipe, this is just an explanation of my approach, so there aren't going to be amounts for the ingredients. That said, I guess it's only fair that I give some idea what I consider a pot of chili to be. My average pot starts with about two pounds of beef. Adding all the other things and water yields about three quarts. Adjust to suit.Though you can make a pot of chili all in the same pot, I prefer to start in a skillet. If you are lazy, do it all in the pot. Put a big heavy skillet on the burner, and throw in a little grease. Oh, I'm a 90s guy, I use a tablespoon of olive oil, but you could use bacon grease or beef fat or even a little Crisco. Select your beef. Serious chili cooks take a round steak or a chuck steak and dice it up, but I think ground beef works just fine. Ground chuck or round is best. Beef in skillet, break it up , and brown it. I use a relatively high heat.We need some onion in there. I like lots. For my pot, I chop up one of them grapefruit sized things, or a couple large ones, or a whole passel of the little ones. Lots of onions. I am especially fond of Vidalia onions, but any variety will do. Dice them or chop them up pretty well. Our onions need to be sauted til cooked through, don't brown them too much. I just throw the onions in with the beef. Cook them up together. Sometimes I am so clever. If you like garlic, now's the time for that, too. I use two or three big fat cloves of garlic diced fine. Since garlic turns bitter if overcooked, toss it in near the end of this step. Garlic only needs a couple minutes to cook. Garlic can handle the long simmer, it just doesn't like to be on the skillet too long.OK, I admit it. I often buy a jar of chopped garlic at the store. Why deal with the peel when you are in a hurry?Now is also the time to cook the peppers I always add a handful of hot peppers. Though they add to the "heat", I mainly add them for flavor. I'll get the heat from the seasonings. You can use a piece of plain old green bell pepper, but don't go overboard or there will be too much "green" flavor. I use several jalapenos or serranos. remove the seeds and other stuff from the middle, chop them up, then throw them in with the meat and onions. Yes, one big happy saute skillet full of stuff. I like a variety of peppers, but serranos are my favorites. Don’t care for the curry-like taste of habaneros.Now that you have chopped up the hot peppers, don't rub your eyes. The hot juice is not so easy to wash off. I never let my knife hand touch the peppers, keeps it "cool" for eye-rubbing and other stuff.After you've sizzled your beef and veggies to a lovely brown, spoon off the excess grease, then dump it all in the pot. Not the grease, dump the beef stuff in the pot. Make soap or candles or something from the left over grease. Over medium heat, we now start to add the liquids. I must digress. Some folks start with a pot of water and throw all the ingredients in. While this works, the beef tastes boiled. By browning the meat first, the sugars and other things in the meat carmelize, giving a better flavor. Boiling cooks at 200 degrees or so, while the skillet cooks at 400 degrees or so. Nothing will carmelize in 200 degree water. Oops, the pot is starting to sizzle. Dump in a can of tomato sauce or puree. If you really like a lot of tomato flavor, use two cans. Just basic sauce, nothing fancy. Fill the can half way with warm water, slosh it around and dump it in too. Wouldn't want to leave the tiniest bit in the can, would we? Pour in a can of beer, after of course you take a good healthy taste just to check for freshness. Now I like beer and all, but I have to admit that it doesn't really add a lot of flavor, it adds a more subtle touch. But it really impresses the onlookers, so make sure someone is watching when you do it. Open a couple cans of beans and pour off the liquid into the pot, but don't add the beans themselves until the end. Add water to the desired consistency. Sometimes I like it thin and brothy, so long as it has a rich flavor. Sometimes I add less water and cook it down until it is very thick. Let us speak of beans. We all know they are the musical fruit, but we need to chose the right bean for the job here. Growing up, I always found kidney beans in the chili, that's my mom's contribution. Kidneys are those big dark red guys. That's a northern thing, Yankee chili if you will. Get rid of them. Pinto beans are the bean of choice, the bean of the great Southwest. Pinto beans go in your chili. Sometimes I use Great Northern beans. When I feel real daring, I use a can of each. Use whatever bean you like, it's your chili after all, but I draw the line at Black beans. They taste good, but they are just too trendy for me. Don't even think about Garbanzo beans. Some cowboys think chili shouldn't have beans at all. If that's the way you want to play, leave the cheese off a pizza, too. Screw 'em, beans is in.My personal rule of thumb is one can of beans for each pound of meat.Here's a thought. Dump a can of pintos onto an oiled skillet, and maybe some finely diced onion or garlic, mash them up into a relatively smooth consistency and heat gently til they bubble. Serve it up with tortilla chips and some salsa. You just made refried beans or frijoles.Like tomatoes? ( I'm back to chili.) Throw in a can of stewed tomatoes, or maybe a cup of crushed tomatoes. If you get the whole kind, chop them up, otherwise buy diced. I like mine pureed, but if you like big red hunks of tomato, go for it.Now we have the basic pot of chili, as yet unseasoned. Let it simmer. Cover it to keep it soupy. Simmering uncovered will allow moisture to escape and it will slowly cook down and thicken. Your choice. About fifteen minutes before serving, dump in the beans so they will heat. If you add the beans at the beginning, they will cook into mush. Of course, if you go for that texture...The seasoning. This is what makes it really chili. Let's face it, what we have so far could become spaghetti, chili, or even sloppy joes. Herbs and spices, hmmm... Colonel Sanders is gone, so we can't ask him about it. The herbs make the difference, the spices just liven it up and make it interesting. Basil and oregano are the defining herbs for spaghetti, leave them on the shelf. Oregano also makes your mouth think: pizza. Wrong again. Ground cumin is the herb that makes chili taste like chili. Start with a tablespoon or two of cumin, add more if you like. Remember a long simmer wakes up the flavors. Unlike sugar or Tabasco, this stuff doesn't work instantly. The flavor will be stronger tomorrow. Let it cook for a few minutes before you add more. Yes, of course you're supposed to taste it all the while you're cooking. Hot pepper is next. I use several dried varieties in the pot. "Ground red pepper" is usually Cayenne. Other types such as piquins, and others each add their own flavors. The oriental markets have a good selection. I keep three or four on my shelf. I use lots, but it is up to you. How hot do you want it? For you sissy types, paprika is a mild cousin. Paprika peppers are dried and ground just like the hot peppers. Paprika comes in quite a few types, with subtle flavor differences. I usually use paprika and peppers both. Hey, leave out the cumin and add lots of paprika, mix it with macaroni, you get goulash. Some other time.I don't use Tabasco much because of the vinegar content. Try some sriracha in its place sometime. You can find it at an oriental grocery, and many grocery stores now have it in the Chinese food section. Squirt some in chip dip. A Ritz cracker with cream cheese and a blob of sriracha is a favorite snack around here. Nibble on that and some fresh jalopenos while we cook the chili.Dry mustard adds zip. Try a teaspoon or two or three. Use the dry mustard powder, not the stuff in a jar like you put on a hot dog. Prepared mustard is full of vinegar, not a good flavor for chili. A little celery salt or powder never hurts. Chili Powder? I never use it. Look at the ingredients: red pepper, cumin, onion powder, etc. We already put that stuff in. Don't forget our old friend black pepper. I also like to visit the oriental grocery and get various hot sauces. I use sriracha sauce in everything. A few tablespoons of Vietnamese hot sauce livens up my chili. Hot bean paste is handy, it adds heat and texture. My regular grocery store now carries sriracha even.I don't give a damn what the Heart Association says, put some salt in it. No salt, tastes watery. Period. The salt police are always suggesting we use lemon instead in our cooking. Yeah, right.Some guys thicken their chili with masa (corn flower), but I think that is cheating. If you want thicker chili, cook it down. Worth the wait and the chili won’t taste like corn mush.A bowl of chili does like to have some Saltine crackers along side, just for moral support.Well, that's how I make chili. Each pot is different, but there is an overall theme to mine. You must establish your own approach to chili. I like to eat straight chili the first day, but the next day I like to put it over steamed rice. I am working on a stir-fry oriental chili. What's next? Try adding some whale blubber for Free Willy Chili. Or try this, get someone else to make up a pot full, but pretend you cooked it yourself. That's Milli Vanilli Chili.So give it a try. Like the man says, it ain’t rocket surgery.Basic ingredientsbeefonions and garlichot pepperstomato saucebeer beanswaterseasonings: red pepper, paprika, cumin, sriracha sauce, mustard, celery salt, black pepper, salt.t.m.Enzo
